Thursday, March 8, 2012

The Woman I Want Her to Be

I came across this article today on Facebook and it really got me thinking.  The title of the article was The Never Before Told Super Secret Ingredient for Raising an Amazing Daughter.  Of course I immediately clicked on the article because doesn't every mother want to have an amazing daughter?

I really think you should click over and read the article yourself, but I'll give you the gist of it.  Basically YOU (as a mother) have to be the woman you want your daughter to be.  This works for you too dads.  You need to be the man you want your son to be.  There are so many good points in the article that provoked a lot of thought and reflection in this little head of mine.

Therefore, the article really got me wondering if I am being the woman I want my daughter to become.  If I could write out a checklist for my daughter, here are some of the things I would want her to be:

Confident:  I am overall a VERY confident person.  I have a lot of confidence in my abilities to accomplish my goals.  I think part of obtaining my goals is also being realistic, but most goals I set for myself I am able to achieve.  Of course I feel insecure at times.  I'm only human.  I don't feel great about the flaws I see on my body and sometimes I think I'm not fast enough to be a "real" runner, but I'm VERY careful not to talk about those things in front of Ella.  She sees me working hard toward my goals and achieving them and I think that's important.

Loving:  I shower my children with love EVERY.SINGLE.DAY.  There is not a day that goes by that I don't tell my children I love them.  If there is any doubt in their minds that I love them then something is wrong in their little heads.  I could improve upon this with my husband, however.  I think it's important for Ella to see how much George and I love each other.  I need to work in this area.

Compassionate:  Being compassionate is a hard thing for Ella to see at such a young age.  We do talk about people being less fortunate and how blessed we are as a family.  I need to show Ella (in real life situations) how she can be compassionate.   I've always wanted to volunteer with my kids at a shelter and even attempted to do so once, but it never came to fruition.  Again, something I need to work on.

Giving:  I think Ella can see that I'm a giving person and not just to her, but to other people as well.  I think I'm doing a good job in this area because I watch my children being very giving to one another, often times thinking of the other before themselves.

Intelligent:  Believe it or not I hold a doctorate degree and I try to do things that stimulate the brain occasionally.  Ha!  I do put a heavy emphasis on school work and creativity and I think it's paying off.   Remember, Miss Ella did just get accepted into the gifted program at school.

Talented:  Everyone's good at something. I usually consider myself average, but the difference is I'm not afraid to try things that some people wouldn't even begin to attempt.  Often times people "confuse" this with talent and that's alright by me.   I can throw a mean birthday party though!

Passionate:  I'm not one to do ANYTHING half assed.  I'm pretty passionate about most things that I do and I give everything I do 100%.  If that's not passion, then I don't know what is.  I may not have found my passion in life (I don't think) but I'm passionate about many things including running.  I think Ella sees the passion I have for running and there are many lessons she can learn from it.

God Loving:  This is something I'm still figuring out for myself.  I've never felt 100% comfortable with my religious "status" in life.  I definitely believe in God and his work.  I'm a firm believer that their is a greater plan for each and every one of us, but often times I forget to turn to God.  I forget in times of gratitude and in times of need.  I wish it came more naturally and was firmly instilled in my heart.  That is what I want for my daughter.

I know I can't be perfect and inevitably there will be negative things my daughter learns from me, but all I can do is keep being the best person (and mother) that I can be.  After reading this article I think I'll choose my words, while driving behind a grandma in the slow lane, a little more wisely.  I'll remember to tell my daughter I love her, but remind her why I love her.  I'll continue to try to be the woman I want her to be.


G. said...

You are an amazing woman and mother - just as your sisters are - hopefully "some" of that came from your mother. xoxo G.

Kelly said...

Thanks for the reminder. Great Blog!!!!

Kortni said...

Love it and was so glad to read the article today. I think your daughter sounds wonderful and she does have a great mom...huge compliment since I have never actually met you!

Lisa said...

Hi there,

I'm the author of the blog you shared. First, thank you so much for sharing it with your readers. Second, I absolutely love what you wrote about yourself and your daughter. I was hoping moms would get what I was trying to say, that we need to take care of ourselves and model that for our daughters. You are a wonderful example of that! Keep riding, running, and swimming.

Lisa Kaplin

Sally Heller said...

Well said. being a mother is not an easy Job. and for some it takes a life time to figure out. For others it comes naturally. since I have nothing to go on ,but seeing you on Facebook and not having seen you as a mother ,I think you are a natural at it. More children should be so blest as to have a Mother like you. Give them all the love you can ,for all too soon they leave the nest to learn to survive in this world, believing only in what you have taught them. Family values and Family virtues. " Devyn's Grandma"

Tanya said...

Hi Susan. You had a link to your blog at the bottom of one of the Breakfast with Santa emails and I am so happy I stopped by and read today's entry.
I will have to keep it in mind as I raise Katie.

Your neighbor!

Momswimbikerun said...

Thanks for reading Tanya!

Momswimbikerun said...

xoxo Sally. Thank you!

Momswimbikerun said...

Thanks for the inspiration and the much needed reminder to set a great example for my daughter.

Momswimbikerun said...


Momswimbikerun said...

of course!!!

Momswimbikerun said...

*tear* thank you!!!

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