The kids are on Spring Break so we went to see The Croods today and then came home and dyed our Easter eggs.
Did you know I'm an Easter scrooge? I hate the Easter Bunny and think the whole concept is stupid. Whatever. I'll participate anyway. Well, I'll supervise anyway.
I'm even more scroogish this year because Nicholas admitted last night to not believing in Santa or the Easter Bunny. He said he's known for a "long time" and was afraid to say anything. I think he was afraid because he was afraid NOT to believe. Regardless, the jig is up. I've talked to him about putting on a good face for the little ones.
I know it was time for him to find out, but it still makes me sad. He's my little boy. I remember not long ago when he was covered in plastic head to toe to decorate eggs when he was too little to even understand what was going on. *sigh*
At least I have two more who believe and are pretty enthusiastic to boot.
I really shouldn't be a Scrooge at all because the day will come, and all too soon, when my kids don't want to dye Easter Eggs at all. I picture myself sitting at the table alone doing the eggs and George rolling his eyes in the living room asking what the hell I'm doing.
So I'll hide the eggs and I'll hide the baskets and I'll hold on to my two kids who still believe as long as I can.
Oh my gosh you guys my body hates me. After my CrossFit workout on Monday (yes Monday and it is now Thursday) I can barely move. My abs hurt so bad. Coughing and laughing are now forms of torture (and yes I still have my stupid cough). My shoulders are incredibly painful too. Drying my hair is just unnecessary right? My right shoulder (not the one I broke) actually feels like my left shoulder did when I was doing PT back in the day. Also my quads. Oh me, oh my... why must I bend down to pick up anything? At this point I'm walking around like an 80 year old woman.
I guess that's what happens when you take almost 12 weeks off from CrossFit and hop right back in like you're some sort of badass. The thing is, you can't EASE into CrossFit. You just have to do. I guess maybe I shouldn't have gone so "hard" but I couldn't help myself. I wanted to be there so badly and give it everything I had. What's a little muscle soreness anyway? Pfft. I got this... ouch I just had to lift my arm to scratch my head!!!
So I've been thinking a lot lately about how I think my time off has affected my thoughts about working out. Some people have asked me if I've found something else to devote my time to and if anything in me has changed.
Here are my thoughts (bullet style):
My hiatus came a a perfect time. I was able to focus on putting my house together. I think my house was almost fully unpacked and settled (for the most part) in under 3 weeks
I am not superwoman and I shouldn't try to be. I was so caught up in working out almost every day and not just little workouts, but intense CrossFit sessions and long runs while training for the marathon. OTHER people may be able to do this, but MY body isn't built for it.
Rest days are your friend (see above). I PROMISE myself that I will take 2 rest days per week when I get back into the full swing of things
I love working out and feeling fit. Even though I know my body needs a break and needs to be treated differently right now, there is nothing I would like more than to be able to train how I want to be training.
Working out is a BIG part of who I am now. Without it, I feel a little lost and I think that's ok.
Eating is a lot more fun when you can eat back those exercise calories. Without exercise there are no cookies :(
Workout clothes double as normal clothes. No one has noticed/ask why I'm wearing yoga pants/capris, SweatyBands or Under Armour despite my inability to workout
I love CrossFit. It's what I miss the most being sidelined. I love running too, but I don't MISS it. Does that make sense?
Life's lessons are a mystery and I'm sure there's something to be learned form all of this.
While my journey to cure my legs is definitely NOT over, I am working on things. I mentioned it briefly before, but I'm convinced that what I'm putting into my body is directly affecting the pain in my legs. When I went on my "crazy" cleanse and was eating 100% clean, my legs stopped hurting. As in they didn't hurt. AT.ALL. As I added the food back in my legs started hurting again.
I'm currently on a no wheat trial to see its effect on me. I've been wheat free since Monday. The problem is, I can't appropriately evaluate the pain in my legs due to my CrossFit session. I'm hoping when my muscle soreness from the workout clears, I'll be able to tell what's going on otherwise.
So yeah, I'm still a mess over here, but life is what it is. I'm keeping a positive attitude (I think). I'm trying to do what little I can when I can and NOT obsess about the rest.
My kiddos are on Spring Break and I plan to spend as much time with them hanging out and doing fun stuff. I might be a little more AWOL, but don't worry I'll be back to catch you all up.
And since all blog posts need pics here's a throwback Thursday Easter style.
So I ran into my CrossFit coach when I was at work last Friday and I told her that this week would mark my comeback to CrossFit. The only thing is, I looked at my scheduled and realized I had something to do everything morning this week and wouldn't make it.
Then Tracey asked me if I wanted to go in the evening to the new CrossFit box that just opened up by my house. Her friend is the owner. The first class is free so I figured why not.
I was a little scared so I texted my friend who I know always goes to the 5:30 am class. She texted me the WOD and it didn't seem so bad. She forgot to mention there was two parts and she only sent me part 2. So yeah when I said it wasn't that bad, um yeah... it was.
The skill was the snatch and I practiced with a 35 pound bar. I could definitely go up in weight, but my form is not perfect. I need to work on it for sure. I started putting too much thought into it and everything fell apart at that point. Ok so far so good. I didn't die.
Next up was WOD 1 (the part my friend left out). This is not little WOD so I'm not sure why she thought isn't wasn't important enough to share. Maybe she didn't want to scare me off. Ha!
Anyway, it went like this. 2 rounds 90 seconds each with 30 seconds rest in between.
Row for calories: Round 1/Round2 18/15
Box Jump 20 inch: 20/18
Ab Mat Sit ups: 40/35
You had to take the lower of your two rounds as your score. The higher the score the better. I scored just 68, but for my first day back, I'll take it.
I kept wanting to go much harder, but I was breathing so hard. Even though my mind wanted to give it a better effort my damn lung wouldn't let me. I'd have been happy if we stopped right there. I was red faced and sweaty already. But NOOOOOO we had a whole other WOD to go.
30 Push Press 35 lbs
30 SDHP (Sumo Deadlift High Pull) 35 lbs
30 K2E (Knees to Elbows) I did mine on the ground
30 KB (Kettlebell) Swings 26 lbs
30 lateral bar pee inducing jumps
30 Pullups (band assisted)
I finished in 15:54
I definitely wasn't the fastest, but I'm proud of my efforts considering everything. I wasn't that far behind and I know I was limited by my cardio abilities, which I hope will come back fast.
Today, well today, I can't walk or move my arms. Who needs limbs?
My legs have been feeling so much better, dare I say good even. Then I worked 10 hours (on my feet) on Friday and my legs were back to being sore again. I really think the soreness in my legs is directly related to the food I'm putting into my body. I know that may seem nuts, but I'm experimenting with things and I hope to figure things out.
Regardless of the dumb leg soreness, I decided I'd go for a SMALL run with Tracey this morning. She was running 8 miles. She started from her house (about three miles away) and I decided to run one mile out to her turn around point and the one mile back. Two miles!
I was actually nervous. Like, couldn't-sleep-because-I'm-running-a-big-race tomorrow nervous. I was up every two hours fretting about whether or not I had missed my alarm. I really WANTED to run, I swear. I just didn't want to be in pain or be pathetically slow (spoiler alert: both happened).
Tracey said she'd be to my house at 7:30 am. I walked out my front door at 7:28 and walked to the road. Just as I crested the hill leaving my development, I saw Tracey speeding down the hill.
It was 26 degrees this morning and it was cold so we got right to it. No sense in standing around and chit chatting. I had so many obstacles going into this run. First, my dumb sore legs. Second, my cold I've been battling for almost 3 weeks (all that's left is that stupid cough) and third, my lack of cardio endurance.
I can't choose which one was hindering me the most. My legs felt mostly good except for the hills. Even the slightest incline and I feel it in my legs. I wish I could explain the pain. It's not pain like injury pain. It's just muscle soreness. It's like running on legs where you did 100 squats the day before. Anyway, it's not fun. I'd hope I wouldn't have any pain, but I was wrong.
I was also coughing the entire run and I felt like my lungs were on fire. I know this is a combination of my crappy cardio and the funky virus in my lungs.
Before I knew it though, we were at the turn around point. One VERY slow mile was done.
Mile 1: 11:31
Why is my face so large?
Tracey is accustomed to running 8:00 miles and here she is running along with me. I can't say enough about her and for her showing me support. It means a lot that she would run along with me at a painfully slow pace just to support me. Thanks Trace!
Anyway, on the way back home I was so discouraged mentally. Once a marathoner and now 1 mile was hard. It was hard physically and hard to accept emotionally. I tried not to look at my Garmin, but I did glance and knew I was running that dreaded 11:00 plus pace. I can tell you however, I was trying as hard as I could.
When we got back to my house my Garmin said 1.72 miles so I decided to keep going to hit the 2 mile mark. Of course it was UP HILL. UGH! I think there were points I was barely moving. Nevertheless, my Garmin eventually beeped the sweet sound of another mile passed and I hit my 2 mile goal.
Mile 2: 12:06 *insert sad face*
I bid farewell to Tracey and headed back home, walking the .28 miles as a cool down and feeling so discouraged.
I've comeback from an injury before, and I know that it's a long road to recovery. I know that I have to take one day at a time and listen carefully to my body. It's just so hard to accept that my body is unable to do what my mind wants it to do. I know time and patience are my best friends right now.
Total: 2.01 Time: 23:50:27 Average: 11:50 whomp whomp
Well guys, all I can say is I'm trying. I hope you'll follow along as I claw my way back.